'to the girl who wears a mask'
you're used to people believing you're strong enough.
so you fake a smile to hide the pain inside.
you're used to everyone finding you as an independent woman. so you mastered a brave front to disguise the tears.
you're used to people laughing at your jokes even during the hardest times of your life. so when you start to show your real emotions, everyone will believe it's all part of your humor.
you're used to everyone seeing you as the funny and lively girl. so when you're alone, nobody dares to ask you if you're okay.
and when somebody finally does, you compose your well-practiced answer of 'i'm fine'. and they will believe you. and you don't mind cause that's the problem, they always believe. nobody notices the crack in your voice when you said it.
what they don't know is when you say you're fine, it means you drown yourself with the heart-ripping memories of betrayal and half-hearted love.
when you say it's nothing, it means you spent your days working 10 hours but when you have a moment to pause, just a moment or two, you overthink.
when you say nothing matters, it means you spent your nights lying at the edge of your bed wherein the dusts and dredges of your rooms are the only witness as you punch you chest trying to ease the pain.
you spent hours staring at the ceiling with silent screams in your head. you do that 'til 3am wherein your playlist is the only thing that saves your sanity.
when you say you're happy, it means you wipe your own tears after getting no answer to your unending question of 'where did i go wrong?'
but hey girl, let me tell you this, IT'S OKAY.
it's okay to cry when you're in pain.
it's okay to be weak when you feel you can
no longer take it.
it's okay not to be okay.
it's okay to spend sleepless nights wondering if aren't you enough.
but please do me a favor. believe that you are. you are more than enough.
the world may change its heart but you don't have to change a thing because you're beautiful just the way you are.
you have to believe that you can stand up once again after being died inside.
you have to take all the baby steps required to finally be genuinely happy instead of just pretending to be.
and lastly, i want you to know that even YOU'RE SCARRED YOU'RE STILL BEAUTIFUL ❤